Superpower #13: Adaptability

When you were about 9, both you and your sister were part of separate, grade-level girl scout troops. Your whole life, you have joyfully joined in just about every activity that was offered at school or in the community and, though sports were always your favorite, you actively participated in whatever we signed up for. If you had friends around and enough to keep you busy, you gladly engaged.

One of my favorite stories of you (and one that our friends and family are all weary of my telling and retelling) is about the day both you and Lucy had a girl scout meeting to attend after school. I found the two of you playing in the living room and said, “Girls, you both have girl scout meetings after school.” You looked over your shoulder, shrugged a bit, and said, “Ok!” with your customary cheer.

Lucy’s little brow furrowed. Now, in her defense, she is 2 years younger than you which means at that point her experiences with after school activities were a bit more limited. But, more, her personality is just more inclined to concern and control than yours. She barraged me with questions:

Lucy: “Where do I go after school?”

Me: “Go with Ella. Her mom is the leader and she will be there.”

Lucy: “What if Ella isn’t at school?”

Me: “Then go with Maren. She is also in girl scouts. Otherwise, I'm sure your teacher will tell you where to go.”

Lucy, frowning more deeply: “What do I do with my coat?”

Me, sighing and taking deep breaths: “They will tell you where to put your coat.”

Lucy: “What if I forget my coat?”

Me: “I will remind you. And if we have to, we can buy you a new one.”

Lucy: “Well, what are we having for a snack?”

Me: “I have no idea.”

Lucy: "Well what if I don’t LIKE the snack?”

And around and around we went. Lucy wanted to consider every contingency and understand every second of the schedule. You were going to girl scouts. End of story. It was such a vivid illustration of the difference in your two personalities. If it weren’t for the comparison, I might not have noticed at such an early age how very adaptable and confident you could be. Had girl scouts been cancelled, had the leader’s daughter not been at school, had you lost your coat, you would have blithely moved through the day, never pausing to worry too much. The flip side of this scenario is that Lucy never loses her coat (you lost one about every other winter), and she often packs a backup snack just in case. You just go hungry if you don’t like something that is being served. (Side note: you usually like almost everything). You are also the child who uses my hair ties, borrows and loses my flat iron, calls me in a panic to bring a backpack or sweatshirt to school long after the first bell. You don’t sweat the small stuff, and in many circumstances, it is a true superpower. Like all superpowers, however, it has its dark side. People who are more prone to planning (like your sister and me) don’t always appreciate when we are called upon to help cover for your lack of foresight and planning. Your unfailing ability to go with the flow is a gift, without question, and things generally work out for you with that breezy approach to life. (A note of caution about this superpower: Be grateful to those of us who worried in advance and consequently planned ahead. The world tends to like you better, even though they like eating our backup snacks and borrowing our backup pencils when they forget).

I like to think of myself as fairly adaptable as well, but my adaptability has more of a Lucy flavor to it. I can generally roll with whatever my day brings because I packed a sweatshirt, umbrella, snacks, and extra tissues in advance as I considered all the possible scenarios and outcomes the night before. You are more likely to roll through your day with an easy smile and a heart fully open to adventure as your life unfolds. It’s a lovely way to live, even if it often involves a sheepish request to borrow necessities from your more prepared friends or family members. Sometimes it means you go without, or get cold, or get hungry or thirsty, but your superpower of adaptability serves you well in those cases as you just keep smiling and move onto the next thing.

Being adaptable will be a great superpower as you head into your bright future ahead. The world is never quite as predictable or plannable as your sister and I would prefer, and nobody sticks very well to an agenda. The world is kinder to those who can respond flexibly to the unexpected, and I know you will. When (not if) you are faced with some kind of surprise, I hope you’ll keep responding with a smile, a shrug, and your cheerful “OK!”