Superpower #4: Snuggling

 You are the most physically affectionate of anyone in our family, and I adore it. This Sunday at church, I found myself between you and your brother Clay who is rocketing into manhood so quickly it is making our heads spin. He is a bit pimply and scruffy, his voice is becoming reliably deep, and we all sidle up to him regularly to see if he has, indeed, surpassed us all in height (not yet!) He used to be more cuddly, but he has reached that awkward age where physical affection, especially from his mom, is anything but welcome. I tried to put my arm around him and to stroke his back as we sat listening to the readings, but he visibly recoiled. I reminded myself of the words I taught myself back when Grace and Sam entered middle school–sometimes the kindest thing to do and the best way to show love is to walk away or, in this case, keep your hands to yourself. Almost simultaneously, you returned to the pew after having excused yourself to use the bathroom and unapologetically sidled right up next to me, hip to hip, and I gratefully threw my arm around you and pulled you close. Then I proceeded to struggle not to cry through the whole Mass.

You are a world class snuggler, Claire-a-belle. You have always joyfully leapt into hugs and onto laps, even as you grew way too big to fit comfortably.  (Not in hugs–you will always fit in those). Both of your sisters are notably reticent about physical touch in general and hugs specifically.  I used to tease Grace when I tried to hug her; I would squeeze and mumble “are you done yet?” as I felt her stiffen and brace herself to endure. You on the other hand, willingly hug. You willingly snuggle. You willingly lean in and onto me and I love it.

Later that day, your boyfriend came over and I watched you snuggle up to him the same way. You threw your legs over his, you leaned your head on his shoulder, you nuzzled into him just like you do to all of us. You are unapologetic in your tendency to be affectionate in this way, and it is a delightful superpower that endears you to so many.

When dad and I read (well, I read, he went to a lecture about it at church with me one date night) the book The Seven Love Languages, we both guessed that yours was physical touch. Of all our babies, you like to be held, and as all of you grow up and away from me, I deeply appreciate your willingness to keep me physically close.

As you head off into the world without us, you may find yourself a bit un-snuggled in your day-to-day life. Luckily, something about playing a team sport means you will find yourself in physical proximity with your friends and teammates regularly. College kids are also likely to pile together on dorm couches and pack into small cars together, possibly as a result of not having a lot of money to buy much extra space. If I know you, there will likely always be people around who will give you a hug when you really need it. And if not, you can always call me. I’m not saying I would get in the car and drive five hours just to give you a hug, but I’m not saying I WOULDN’T do that either.

Snuggling as a superpower might not be the most obvious thing but trust me when I say that it is. If there’s anything our deeply divisive, highly digitized, and disconnected world could use right now, it’s a big, exuberant, unapologetic CC super hug. You just might save the world with this one!