I have spent the morning with your sister at another basketball
tournament. It started with me tiptoeing around a pitch black hotel room
trying not to wake her and included a trip to a nearby grocery store to fill
her “snack bag” for the day. Our hotel does not offer breakfast, so I
also grabbed her a few things to eat before her first game. (I also
snagged a bottle of wine since I got caught empty handed at a recent post-game
parent gathering which is such a rookie move for an experienced travel sports
mom/drinker like me).
For breakfast, I had made a list in my head—fruit, yogurt, muffins—and I
wandered sort of blindly around the unfamiliar store looking for the items.
I ended up with some pre-packaged chocolate chip muffins, “go-gurt”, and
berries. I hesitated in the yogurt section, looking at some moderately
healthy selections, but then realizing she would likely be eating in the car or
on a hotel bed, and I didn’t have spoons or napkins readily available. I
felt pretty guilty making my way to the checkout knowing I was not providing
her with much in the way of nutrition. (Indeed, my iPad’s internal spell
checker kept changing the name “go-gurt” to “go-hurt” which seems a bit ironic and apt).
I ran through additional on-the-go breakfast options and decided my
admittedly questionable choices were likely the best I could do, and, somewhat
guiltily, collected my bags and left. What does this whole, mundane story
have to do with you? Two things: one, I have significantly limited
control over your food choices these days. You eat so few meals with us,
and most of our weekends are spent apart. I think I have said before that
my parents were very graceful and gracious in their parenting of my teenage
self, allowing me increasing freedom and flexibility as the years passed. I have tried to offer the same to you, and this goes for most of your
meals. And, two, you have by far the worst eating habits in our family.
You disdain most vegetables, tolerate only a few fruits, love sugar,
prefer fast food to almost anything I cook at home, and in general seem
committed to attempting to live on high fructose corn syrup, salt, and fast
food. I know this is not unusual for a teenager, but I would be remiss in
my motherly duties if I didn’t recommend, at least once in this series of
letters, that you need to eat a few vegetables once in awhile.
I have spent a lot of time in the last few years reading and educating
myself on the topic of nutrition and the dark underbelly of our American food
industry. Most everything available to us by way of food, especially fast
and readily available food which is so essential to our wild family schedule,
is total crap. Sam, before you go, eat your vegetables.
In some ways, I blame my dad for your eating habits. When we were
first introducing you to solid foods, we lived with my parents. In their
defense, my parents eat extremely healthily, and when I was growing up we had
almost no junk food available to us. At mealtimes during those early
months, my parents generously served us a variety of very healthy options.
We had plenty of salads and baked root and cruciferous vegetables, lots
of fresh fruit and lean meats. There was no issue with the menu.
The problem was that at the end of every meal, your doting grandfather
served up their go-to grandchild dessert—Oreo cookies. Here is where the problem
came in. While you were a bit fussy about the puréed veggies and fruits I
tried to serve you, you were notably enthusiastic about the cookies. I
never had the heart to not let your adoring grandpa spoil you with sweets—it’s
a grandpa’s prerogative after all. And since we were taking advantage of
their generous hospitality, I didn’t want to get too bossy about food. I
honestly didn’t think it would really hurt too much—you were still nursing (and
you were always a very enthusiastic nurser) for the majority of your calories,
so I trusted your nutritional needs were being amply met.
Somehow, however, I seem to have missed the opportunity to teach you to
enjoy healthy options alongside the sweets and junk you so adore. Before
you go, cultivate some appetite for healthy foods. I know it is tempting
to subsist on pop tarts and hot Cheetos, but trust me when I say you will
someday regret it. In addition to the risk of issues and disease down the
road, you must surely know that you don’t come from the kind of genetic
material that ensures you will stay lean no matter what you eat. You have
the benefit of teenage boy metabolism right now, but believe me that it won’t
always be the case. And, honestly, you will just feel better if you eat
some things that are orange and green and red (and I’m not talking about sour
patch kids) every once in awhile.
Next year, the vanishingly small influence I have over your diet will shrink
to almost nothing, so before you go (and forever after), eat your vegetables!
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