Superpower #21: Decisiveness

Your 21^st superpower is decisiveness, and it manifests in your life in so many ways. Perhaps one of the clearest was when you chose to go to college at Maryville. You were so sure. I have always told my kids that when making the big decisions in your life, there is something to be said about “when you know, you know.” For me this was true in choosing a college, a husband, and deciding to get a new hip among other things.  When it came to choosing Coe for me, I could feel in my bones that it was right from the moment I arrived on campus. You were equally decisive. Even though we had visited multiple schools and still more wanted to talk to you, you said the words I will never forget as we pulled out of the parking lot from your visit. "I think I want to commit," you said, quietly and a bit uncertainly. You knew you were the on the cusp of something gigantic and this was not a choice to make lightly. We spent a few minutes discussing options and reassuring you. And then you called the coach and committed.

A similar example happened when you decided that you wanted to date Owen. If I remember correctly, Owen was in the process of “talking to” someone else. (This euphemism is unique to your generation and, according to AI, “generally refers to the stage where two people are getting to know each other and are interested in each other, but they haven't yet defined their relationship as exclusive or official.” But I imagine you already knew that). Anyway, Owen was “talking to” (is it appropriate to use quotation marks to offset that?) someone else, but you decided you were interested in him. According to legend, you made it clear to him that you wanted to be "talking to him" or maybe more. You made the moves, you made the plans, and you got the boy. (I should ask you sometime who he was “talking to” way back then. I wonder if he even remembers). Clearly your instincts were right as 3 years later the two of you are still going strong.

With a little time, I think I could come up with countless examples of your decisiveness, from the choices you make about what to eat, what to wear, where to go, and on and on. I, too, am a quick decision maker, often following the ready, fire, aim mentality of navigating my daily experience. By and large, this isn’t the worst way to go through life (at least from my perspective), particularly when you can boast superpowers like adaptability, focus, optimism, and confidence to back you up when your decisions aren’t the absolute best. I would caution you, however, that cultivating an ability to step back, think through, and insert a pause into the gusto with which you hurl yourself into your life might not be the worst idea.

That said, however, I have also noticed a troubling tendency to second guess yourself when around certain outspoken others. Don’t ever forget that most of us are just making things up as we go, and that very few of the myriad decisions we are faced with on any given day matter all that much. I’ve always found a lot of wisdom in my uncle Ding’s mantra: “Make a decision. If you don’t like it, make another one!”

By harnessing your superpower of decisiveness, I am certain that you will navigate the challenges of your life to carve out a delightful future of success and fulfillment. Decide, and be dazzling.